What is Compatibility

Compatible” means “able to exist or occur together without conflict.” In other words, it’s about getting along, which usually comes from wanting the same or complementary things.

It’s hard to judge compatibility when you’re first falling for someone. There’s probably little or no conflict during the early stages because you’re just so darn crazy about each other that you overlook your differences. Plus, you’re still learning about each other, so you haven’t discovered all the potential points of conflict yet. As you get to know each other better, and as the rose-colored glasses fall away, you start noticing more disagreements, and then you can figure out if there’s genuine long-term potential with this person.

Signs of relationship compatibility

Some compatibility to look for in relationship

1* Lifestyle compatibility.

How do you like to structure your life day in and day out? Does one of you like to go out a lot while the other likes to stay in? Is one of you always chasing new experiences while the other likes what’s familiar?

2* Values compatibility.

What do you each value? Tradition? Family? Individuality? Togetherness? Autonomy?

3* Financial compatibility.

What are your attitudes toward money? Are you both savers? Or maybe both spenders? How do you approach financial decisions? How important is security to each of you, and how important is freedom?

4* Sexual compatibility.

What are your attitudes toward sex? Is one of you experimental while the other likes routine? How often do you like to have sex? What do you like to do in bed?

5* Conflict resolution compatibility.

When a problem does arise, how do you handle it? Do you like to shout for an hour and then sort things out, or does shouting upset you? Can you see each other’s perspectives? Do you play fair or fight dirty?

No two people are perfectly compatible, but the more incompatibility, the more conflict. Love is not enough to overcome constant conflict. It’s entirely possible to love someone but realize you’re too incompatible to be happy together in a romantic relationship.

What determines compatibility?

Compatibility is a match between whatever qualities the partners deem important for staying in a relationship. The extent of this match does not have to reach 100%, but it has to cover at least those qualities the absence of which a partner would consider a deal-breaker.

Compatibility is the state of comfortable coexistence between partners. If they can be comfortable and make a relationship work in a constructive manner while being absolutely different, they are still compatible.

READ ALSO: 13(SIGNS OF SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP), WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE IN A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP

Signs of relationship compatibility

If you are in a relationship that is still at the infant stage, it would be helpful to ask yourself, “Am I compatible with my partner?” Co-existing is difficult in relationships, marriages, associations, partnerships, etc. It requires that both parties possess certain qualities that are capable of making them compatible.

If you are not sure of the answer, you need to check for signs of compatibility and conduct what you may want to refer to as a “Relationship Compatibility Signs

1* You are each other’s priority

If your partner does not see the need to satisfy your desires or prioritize your relationship, then it is likely that you two are not compatible. You are supposed to be your partner’s priority and vice versa. Your happiness is supposed to be a derivative of your partner’s satisfaction and happiness.

Compatible partners seek to make each other feel loved and important by meeting one another’s needs or desires.

2* You know things about each other no-one else does

From your embarrassing stories to intimate details about your life, sharing secrets can show how compatible you and your partner really are. Honesty is important in a relationship, but actually wishing to tell them secrets shows your partner that you are truly invested in the relationship

3* You like your partner the way they are

Compatible partners do not seek ways to change the personality of their partner. They like their partner the way they are. If any flaws or weaknesses are found in their partner, they create an enabling atmosphere for their partner to address it personally, rather than influence or compel their partner to change against their will.

4* You are not ashamed of your partner

Is your partner ashamed of showing off your relationship publicly? Maybe he doesn’t feel comfortable being with you in the relationship.

If your partner is embarrassed to hold you in public, play with you, or do anything that depicts that both of you are in a relationship, it could be a sign that you are not compatible.

5* You don’t want to change them

You respect your partner as an individual, and you don’t want to try to change them. Sure, they may talk in their sleep or dress in a way you don’t like, but you love them, and you can deal with it. If you want to change your partner’s personality or appearance, it could mean you and your partner aren’t compatible.

6* No atom of doubt about your love

What makes compatible couples is the presence of absolute and concrete trust between them. Lack of confidence is a product of doubt in love between you and your partner or spouse.

Therefore, if you find yourself constantly doubting the love your partner claims to have for you, then it is likely that both of you are not compatible.

7* You share common interests

While it is important to have your own hobbies and interests, compatible partners make the effort to spend time together doing things they both enjoy. Having common ground with a partner helps in long term relationships – from supporting the same team, to cooking together, to sharing a love of the same TV show

You share common interest

8* You Sacrifice

Sacrifice is the apex of every successful relationship. Partners should be willing to sacrifice for their spouse or partner. Sacrifice can be in terms of meeting your partner’s needs, satisfying their desires, etc. Being able to sacrifice for each other is one of the most important signs of compatibility.

9* You want to work out serious problems

Often big issues can be raised in long term relationships, including money, religion, or where you both live. Most issues like these can be solved if the partners are compatible and are willing to compromise. It is important to work together until you reach a decision you’re both happy with – and for both people to be happy, it is likely that both have to compromise

10* Your friends and family know them well

If you’re in a great relationship, you should be excited to show your partner off around your friends and family. It also shows they are actively involved in your life, which is a great sign for a happy relationship. If the people you are close to haven’t met your partner, ask yourself who’s to blame for this; your partner, you, or the people you are close to?

11* You can both imagine a future together

While you don’t need to be picking out wedding invites, it is always useful to be on the same page as your partner. Having different interests isn’t a problem; your partner could love travelling and you could aspire to get married and have children, and you can do both. But if your partner doesn’t want to talk about a future together, it might be that you have different expectations from the relationship.

12* You’re attracted to each other

While sex obviously isn’t everything, it’s important to be physically intimate with your partner. From holding hands to kissing, compatible couples regularly show each other affection. In other words – there should be a spark, even if it is small!.

Early Signs You & Your partner Aren’t Compatible

Sometimes compatibility judgement can be realized in a short time however, most of the time it takes a longer period of time to have an opinion on compatibility.

Having nearly same belief system on basic and fundamental topics plays an important role in judging compatibility. Having respect for each other also contributes to compatibility. Ability to understand the “meaning” of words and actions of the other tells a lot about compatibility which comes over time and with trust.

If someone is repeatedly making you bring out your bad side, it is a clear cut sign that you are not compatible. If someone is repeatedly hurting you and vice-versa, you are not compatible. If you are not able to accept the difference of opinions, you might not be compatible. If you are not able to make each other understand your views and perspective in an amicable way, you may not be compatible. If you guys repeat the same mistakes with each other, you may not be compatible. If you guys cant understand what is important (in terms of DOs and DONTs) for the other person, you are not compatible.

Making a judgement and decision on the above, takes time and one should not be impatiently judgmental to jump on any conclusion in a short time.

READ ALSO: NARCISSIST IN RELATIONSHIP, HOW TO COPE WHEN YOU LOVE A NARCISSIST

1* Your Lives Are Going In Opposite Directions.

If you don’t share a similar enough view of the future, it may be a sign of incompatibility. Maybe you want to get married and bae doesn’t. Or maybe you want kids and that’s completely off the table for your partner. Whatever the case, if you and your partner can’t get on the same page about important life decisions, you might be better off finding someone who is.

2* Your Core Values Don’t Match Up.

Another sign you and your partner might be incompatible is if “your core values heavily contrast, like your “views on monogamy [versus] non-monogamy, marriage, children, religion, and finances.” Sometimes, agreeing to disagree, especially on politics and religion, can work just fine for some couples.

But if you find that you’re constantly arguing about the upcoming election or how you two live out your faith, you might want to re-consider your partnership. Likewise, if your partner wants to be in an open relationship when you’re all about monogamy, or they’re recklessly spending on your dime, or they just aren’t as into the same priorities as you, it might be time to have some hard conversations.

You are attracted to each other

3* You & partner Have Significantly Different Sex Drives.

One partner having a higher sex drive than the other is a fairly common occurrence, simply because of the fact that most people’s libidos ebb and flow over time. It’s unrealistic to expect that you and your partner will want to have sex the same amount of times, every single time, over the course of your entire relationship.

That being said, if you find you or your partner don’t want to initiate sex very often or at all, that’s worth discussing. More than just a sign of incompatibility, it can also be indicative of something greater at play. Emotional connections to sex, lack of intimacy or loss of trust with a partner, self-image issues, or boredom all can result in a lower interest in sex.

Importance Of Relationship Compatibility

Compatibility is the synchronization of different values between partners. They include personal views, backgrounds, philosophical insights, and even different interests. When the relationship lacks adequate compatibility, it may break down after a few months or years.
You can be compatible partners by trying and understanding each other’s likes and dislikes, communicating your thoughts and feelings, and having discussions to support your thought processes. It is an attribute that strengthens with time and effort. Compatibility does not mean you and your partner have to agree on every matter. Instead, it’s about sharing different ideologies and acknowledging them.

Thanks for reading, please share to educate others and don’t forget to like and comment your opinion in the comment section. See you next time and have a peaceful day.